Trusting

Would you put your life into the hands of someone you really don't know all that well? I have. But, thankfully, He knows me really well.

I was thinking about my relationship with the Lord and how much I want to trust Him with every area of my life and all the sudden it hit me: for my trust in Him to increase my knowledge of Him must also increase.

[now, I am sure there is a passage in scripture that says something like this and most likely I have read it before and that is why I had this thought...but I am thankful, none the less, for the sweet whisper of the Holy Spirit to remind me of it]

I can give up striving to trust Him more and simply spend time getting to know Him more. What a treat!! I don't have to conjure up trust or work really hard-- I just have to hang out.

I am so excited... I love hanging out... and hanging out with the master and creator of this world is a pretty cool opportunity to have!

Life is like a Brownie Sundae

Okay folks, I know this sounds a bit wacky, but stay with me! I think you'll enjoy the illustration.

[And wasn't it Forest Gump who said, "life is like a box of chocolates." ]

I was going out with this guy a few months ago and I have to say it was one of the most fun relationships I have ever had. Nothing too complicated to work through, nothing too serious about our time together... it was just clean fun. SO, I was at church one Sunday morning (while in above relationship) and while we were singing song "Blessed be Your Name" I realized my life is really good. [some of you are assuming I am thinking this because I am in said relationship, but you know what they say about assuming...]


Then I had this image of a brownie sundae pop in my head. [Strange, right?]


As I started to think about it I realized this is a really good illustration for life-- if you're willing to stretch your imagination just a bit.

The Brownie on the bottom is the foundation of the sundae. It is what makes the brownie sundae different from other sundaes. For me Christ is my foundation and He is what makes my life different from other's. Without Him I would just be a boring old ice cream sundae and really what is the fun in that?

The ice cream is my life. It is my community, my family and my friends. It is good. I don't need it, but it sure makes the brownie taste even sweeter.

Then there is the whipped cream--Yummy! I like to think of this as the fun stuff in life. Trips, special occasions, new adventures... Sometimes you get a lot and sometimes you get a little but no matter how much you get you enjoy it. It too makes the brownie taste even sweeter.

Lastly, there is the cherry (and/or the sprinkles on top). A brownie sundae would still be considered a brownie sundae without these two things, but they are a fun addition! A brownie sundae is no less sweet without it. But it is a special treat to have that cherry on top. For me relationships are like the cherry on top. They're a special treat, but life is no less sweet without them.

So what I realized that day is life is good because God is my solid foundation. All the other things can melt away but He stands firm forever. "Taste and see that the Lord is good!"

"Both the Builder and the Wrecking Ball"

When I first started working I drove past this little church everyday. They always had encouraging little quotes or sayings on their sign. This particular one caught my attention more than others (and has stuck with me ever since).

"Allow God to renovate your life"

-the sign outside the New Hope AME Church

At the time I was working on a huge home renovation project. It was my first job out of college and I really didn't know anything about renovating a house. I was a fish out of water, but I was determined to learn everything I could and do a good job. Thankfully, I worked in the office of a fabulous designer who led me through some uncharted territory and taught me everything I needed to know.

Today that sign means more to me.

For the past nine months I have been working on another huge renovation. Only this one isn't a multi-million dollar home renovation, it is a life renovation-- my life.

At first I was a bit resistant to the change. In fact, I would say for the first few months there really wasn't much work being done, at least none that I could see. It was more like the planning and permitting stage. With any good renovation you have to make plans and once they are set you go get the permits. Then the demolition begins.

Demolition felt like the longest part of this process. The Lord ripped out so many of my misconceptions about who He is and who I am in Him. He tore down walls I had built to protect myself and walls I put up to keep feelings at bay. This part is hard and often painful.

"The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain."

--Kahil Gibran

Demolition left me feeling empty and broken. I wasn't sure there was anything left of Melissa Rau to salvage and if there was I wasn't sure I would make. But the Lord was my support and my strength. I kept reminding myself: "being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ." (Philippians 1:6)

Sometimes [truthfully, always] renovations take longer then the homeowner anticipates. So you have to learn to wait. [I'm learning, slowly but I'm learning] But it so exciting when the new stuff starts going in and the plans begin to take shape right before your very own eyes! Truth is put into place and Love abounds. Joy and Peace and Patiences begin to be more than just a dream. Faith is something you have not just something you want.

I didn't set out nine months ago to start this renovation project. I really just thought the Lord was teaching me some new things and sending me in a new direction. But today I see it as so much more. He has done a work that only He can take credit for. "Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain." (Psalms 127:1)

He has knocked me down only to build me up even stronger. He is my firm foundation, my rock and my salvation!

Update on Below Post...

My Dad informed me the other evening over dinner that foosball is not a sport and the correlation between tennis and foosball didn't really work...


But he obviously forgot the pain I endured back in high school because of my "foosball injury" [my mother and I still refer to it as that]


He may be correct, foosball is probably not considered a sport. But that does not negate the pain I suffered when I was a senior in high school from playing foosball for hours on end at a friend's house one night. I woke up the next morning with the most throbbing pain in my right arm. I couldn't imagine what I had done to cause such terrible pain (at the time I was unaware my night of fun could be at fault). Thankfully my father is a chiropractor who specializes in extremities (that is arms and legs folks) so I went to see him. He then sent me to the massage therapist who as she was working on my arm informed me I had inflamed my muscles because of playing foosball the night before. I never would have guessed it, honestly!

Now folks, this sounds dramatic, I know. I only tell this story to add some credibility to my below post. And hopefully you'll laugh a little bit and all will be well!

Back to Work

Today I was oh, so thankful to be going to work.


Last week I was in the bed sick and tired. I think I had the flu. It really didn't surprise me when I ended up sick. Five days with three little ones (in the cold) and they all were stuffed up... I saw it coming. [or I should say felt it coming] Only I didn't really do anything to ward it off. Silly me!


But forget about being sick, it is no fun and certainly no fun to talk about.


I think having two weeks away from work made me realize I really do love what I do. I am very thankful God has blessed me with a job that is fun and creative and often challenging. I work with one of my dearest friends and I have to admit that adds a lot to my working days. We generally have a blast while doing our job and long hours don't seem so long when you're working alongside a friend.

And we do put in some long hours and work hard, even though we have fun together...


Being a mom for five days I definitely put in long hours and the work never really stopped. Even while I was sleeping I had to be aware I could be called up at any moment. And forget about weekends, those hold little allure. It was challenging, there is NO denying that. But it was such a different kind of challenging work. I described it to a friend like this: When I played tennis growing up I had my muscles trained to work a certain way and I used the same muscles every time I picked up my racket. But when I went to play something else (like foosball for instance) I used those muscles trained to swing a tennis racket differently or even sometimes muscles I didn't use playing tennis. And let me tell you I would be sore the next day. It was always funny to me how sore I would be the next day, I couldn't understand it. I still was strong from playing tennis but that strength really didn't prepared me for playing foosball.

Are you wondering how I am going to relate this two topics?? [I'm a tad bit worried too.]

Working as an interior designer isn't really preparing me to be a mom. Just like playing tennis didn't really prepare me to play foosball. I am used to working hard, I like to work hard but man, I am not used to the hard work of being a mother of three little children. It is a LOT of work and it never stops. Right now I have a job that I get up and go to in the morning and leave in the evening. When you are a mom you don't stop being a mom, it is constant.

I learned a few things, while I was building up new muscles, working as a mom:

1. I don't want to stop being creative and having fun when I become a mom-- they are just a part of who I am.

2. My dream job (being a wife and mother) might just be the most challenging job on this earth-- I have my work cut out for me one day.

3. I think I'll marry someone I consider a friend just as much as a lover (excuse the cheesy term, I don't know what else to say) it will make the long hours and challenges so much more enjoyable-- and I'm thinking as parents you need that.

4. It will probably take me a long while to get my "mom muscles" strong and trained-- but that is ok, strength training takes time.

And for right now I am thankful to go to work in the morning and leave at the end of the day.